Green? Means go. Crunching metal? Yeah - ya might wanna stop.
It promised to be a beautiful morning, as my feet hit the chilled, painted slats. I smiled as I stretched my arms overhead, and waited for the blue birds to come help me make the bed. I imagined myself being donned with a frock by visiting squirrels, and other small rodents - and I laughed to myself over the bliss and total absurdness of it all!
Eh, who am I kiddin'?
Morning sucks, I hate waking up, the floor is freakin' cold, I scare myself as I catch a glance of the raccoonesque eyes in the mirror, and I wish I could hurl that obnoxious alarm clock with the green flashing lights across the room. Stupid clock. But I trudge through anyway - make my bed [without the charming blue birds who, by the way, never show up], and complete my morning routine. By the time I leave the house the sun is peeking over the horizon, and I start my car in a haze of exhaustion and relief that I'm actually going to get to work early.
I put the car in reverse in an attempt to get my vehicle circled around so I could exit the driveway face-forward. All of a sudden I hear this CLUNKCLUNKCLUNK'ing noise. Was the transmission falling out? Would the engine explode? Did I have a flat tire? I waited with labored breath to see if perhaps the entire vehicle was on the verge of implosion. I didn't hear anymore "clunking", so I threw the car into reverse once again, gassed it - and heard the all-too-familiar sound of metal on metal. Yes, I had been repeatedly slamming into our 1972 Dodge Dart which sat precariously on the edge of the yard and the driveway - mocking me.
I cursed and put the car into gear, dragging the '72 Dart a little as I spun forward in a fit of exhausted rage. Rolling my eyes and muttering obscenities under my breath, I got out of my monster SUV to survey the damage. Thankfully no damage was done to MY car (heh), but I definitely made my mark on the Dart. There it sat - a cavernous dent that glared at me proudly next to the one my Dad had made similarly a few months previous. His weapon of choice had been our PT Cruiser, which thankfully came through unscathed. Like Father like Daughter, I suppose.
I guess it's a good thing that I'll be bringing my new baby home today - a '96 Volvo, gold, with all the trimmings. That sweet thang is gonna be mine to drive, and I'm thrilled! For its sake, I promise, I'll look before I back up. ;-)
F R I D A Y !
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